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Some men, in order to prevent the supposed intentions of their adversaries, have committed the most enormous cruelties.

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Defining and analyzing humor is a pastime of humorless people.

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I hate those men who would send into war youth to fight and die for them; the pride and cowardice of those old men, making their wars that boys must die.

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I hope life isn't a big joke ... because I don't get it.

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Not even computers will replace committees, because committees buy computers.

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There's no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you.

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I've had a wonderful time, but this wasn't it.

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The use of COBOL cripples the mind; its teaching should, therefore, be regarded as a criminal offense.

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Emulate your heros, but don't carry it too far. Especially if they are dead.

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